December 16, 2010

Peaches

(Chinese translation included below, 中文版再往下)


He sat alone in his room

thinking

maybe he should go outside and get some fresh air

being inside all day must be bad for the body and mind

these past few days he hasn't gone outside

and he's been having these weird thoughts

"is there someone in the closet?"

no

"is someone knocking on the door?"

no

“is there someone touching his face as he slept?”

maybe

...

he prepared a camera that he set up above his door

if anyone opened the door, it would start recording automatically

he went to sleep

but he wasn't sleeping at all

4 in the morning there finally was a sound

someone opened the door

...

slowly entered

...

this person it seemed had put on perfume

桃子

so familiar...

he was under his bed sheet shaking

this person, monster, ghost, whatever, stood to the left of his bed watching him

he couldn't help it

he opened his eyes

...

....

......

it was her

his love

she stroked his cheek

he started to cry

"i miss you so much"

she didn't say a word

just smiled

kissed his forehead

left

he didn't sleep till the sun rose and when he woke up

his body was covered in sweat

his faced covered in tears

the room the smell of 桃子

the recording nothing but static

the end

.



他獨身在房間裡

在想

他是不是要出門透氣一下

一直在房間裡應該對身體, 心理不好

他這幾天沒有出門

開始很多怪怪的想法

"是不是有人在衣櫃裡?"

沒有

有人在敲門?

沒有

睡覺的時候有人在摸我的臉嗎

?

好像有

...

他準備一台攝影機在門上面

有人開門的話它會自動拍

他去睡

但是他並沒有在睡

凌晨4點他終於聽聲音

有人開門

...

慢慢進入

...

這個人好像有噴香水

peaches

好熟

他在床被下一直在發抖

那個人, 怪物, 鬼甚麼的在他的床左手邊站著看著他

他沒辦法

他開眼

...

....

......

就是她

他最愛的

她用她的手摸那男生的臉

那男生開始哭

"我好想妳"

她一聲不講

就笑

親他的額頭

過沒睡覺幾個小時候, 日出, 那男生起床的時候

全身都是汗

臉上都是眼淚

房間都是peach的味道

拍的影片都是天點

.

December 3, 2010

台灣環島 My Taiwan Walkabout




"Walkabout是個澳洲原住民從男孩到男生的過程, 一個男孩得去野地住長期(六個月)."
-從Wikipedia翻譯


怎麼說...從台北到最南點然後回去最北部, 有個成就感, 有個傷心...真的難解釋.

在石門的時候往者臺灣海峽就開始想太多...這個路程是為了什麼? 我真的有學到東西嗎? 我去過澳洲也是幹嘛的? 何必那麼辛苦賺錢然後跑來跑去把它花掉?

這些話讓我想到我父母. 對他們來說這四年我都沒有出息, 沒做甚麼讓他們覺得兒子有價值. 去台灣讀中文 (讀幹嗎, 為甚麼不學個技術), 回美國打工 (賺不到錢), 去澳洲當工人 (很丟臉), 去旅行花錢(為甚麼不把錢弄掉債)...

我知道他們的想法. 他們是為我好. 我過的生活他們根本不了解, 其實蠻多人不了解. 我也是覺得我是在個很深黑暗的地方摸來摸去, 在找路的人, 然後父母一直覺得他們需要推我去模個方向我才不會跳岸.

但在石門, 看那些釣魚人的小登浮在水上我有的到個魔術感, 得到個靈感.

我明天死掉的話, 對, 我會覺得, "幹! 我還有很多事要做!" 但是我覺得我過的生活是很幸福, 我碰到的人很有趣, 我看過的事情很豐富...我覺得我的生活有價值.

每個行程要結束. 我回去會好好跟我爸媽大和解希望他們了解這段時間我是很需要的.



"A walkabout refers to a rite of passage during which male Australian Aborigines would undergo a journey during adolescence and live in the wilderness for a period as long as six months."
-Wikipedia


How do I say this...after going from Taipei to the most southern point and all the way back up to the top of the island, there's a feeling of accomplishment, but there's also a sadness lurking about inside.

Standing on a pier in Shimen, looking out at the waters of the Taiwan Strait I begin to think too much...what was this trip for? Did I really gain anything? And why the hell did I go to Australia for? Why should I work my ass off doing manual labor and then go run around spending all my hard earned money?

These thoughts made me think of my parents. To them, these past four years I've done nothing of merit, nothing of real value. Went to Taiwan to study Chinese (why don't you study a real skill?), went back to the states and worked part-time (there's no money in that), went to Australia and did manual labor (that's embarrassing), traveled and spent my money (why don't you use your money more wisely?)...

I know how they think. They want what's best for me. They totally don't understand the life I lead, actually, most people don't understand. And to be honest, I don't get it that much either. I feel like a guy wandering in the pitch dark, feeling my way around. My parents feel as if they don't push me in what they think is the right direction, I'm going to fall off a cliff.

But here in the evening darkness at Shimen (Stone Gate), watching the bright green and pink glow-sticks attached to the fishermens' bait float gently on the water, I feel a bit of magic, a bit of inspiration.

If I died tomorrow, yeah, I'll say to myself, "FUCK! I still have so much more to do!" But even then, I believe that my life is blessed. I've met so many interesting people, I've seen so many different places.

I believe my life, the life I led and the life I lead, has worth.

Every journey has to end. When I get home I'll be sure to make up with my parents and hopefully get them to understand that this "wasted time" was time I truly needed.


November 24, 2010

Book Reflection: A Fortunate Life by A.B. Facey

Note: After I read a novel or watch a film, I write a brief reflection on it. I generally do it for myself, but I plan to be posting more of them up on this blog as time goes on. I prefer the word "reflection" vs the word "review" because reflection to me means going over the content of a work and letting the work engender ideas in the mind of the reader. Reflection is an interactive creative process whereas to "review" seems to be more of an academic or commercial activity.

Double Note: There are spoilers.




Title: A Fortunate Life
Author: A.B. Facey


“A Fortunate Life” was a book I picked up from a bookshelf in the hotel I was working at in Australia. I did it purely on recommendation from my coworker/friend. As we were casually walking out of the office, he pointed at this title and said to me, "This is a great book." I borrowed it from the hotel for a month and got really close to finishing it before I left my job and went to travel. I was literally reading this book instead of packing my bags my last night in town, but I still had a few chapters to go. Luckily I was able to find a copy of "A Fortunate Life" (with pictures!) at a public library here in the states and finished the rest of the book today.


And I'm glad I read it.


"A Fortunate Life" is an autobiography written by A.B. Facey in 1979 at the age of 85. Most of the book takes place before the age of 20 in the Western Australian outback. Facey's father died when he was two and his mother left him and his siblings to their Grandma. Therefore Facey had to go out and work on various farms as early as he could, at the age of 8, to lessen the financial burden on his family.


Mr. Facey did not have a proper education, but taught himself how to read and write as an adult. He writes in prose and writes things as he sees them. Some of his observations are profound. Working on the farms in the outback, Facey had no younger companions, and would spend hours watching the birds and the animals to keep him company. At that time he was just a young boy, but by then he had already faced hardships and cruel people (some of his employers would beat and whip him).


He saw that the animals also lived in the face of fear and danger, always listening, looking, smelling for danger. From the smallest bird to the human, they each have to face the business of survival and find their own way.


Another observation Mr. Facey makes, much later in life at the age of 52, is that having been in WWI and now seeing the men coming back from WWII with a profound sadness in their eyes, he finds it hard to believe in God. He writes, “I feel that the Bible is a book that was written by man, not for the good of man but for the purpose of preying on a person's conscience, and to confuse him. Anyone who has taken part in a fierce bayonet charge (and I have), and who has managed to retain his proper senses, must doubt the truth of the Bible and the powers of God, if one exists. [...] No sir, there is no God, it is only a myth.”


[spoiler alert]


However, a couple chapters back, he writes about how in WWI he was given a comfort package (packages of day-to-day items given at random to soldiers) of socks from an unknown Ms. Evelyn Gibson from Bunbury. After nearly being killed a number of times, he was finally able to make it home to Western Australia. In Perth, while walking with a fellow soldier north on Barrack St., he bumps into two girls that strike up a conversation with him and his mate. One of the girls ask him about the war and if he and his friend knew anyone from their town, Bunbury. Facey asks the girl, the most beautiful girl he's ever seen, for her name. She says, Evelyn Gibson.


Here, he writes the word "Providence".


Life is insane. Against all odds, Facey survives the war and of all the streets in Perth, he walks down this one (in a northerly direction), and of all the girls he bumps into, he bumps into the one that sent him a pair of socks while he was in the trenches. He bumps into the future love of his life and his lifelong partner for nearly 60 years.


So, is he contradicting himself?


I don't think he cares. These questions of the existence of God and Fate, are not important to CERTAIN people. A.B. Facey is one of those people. When faced with ill fortune, he does not curse the gods, but tries to think of ways to overcome the obstacles. When faced with good fortune, he is grateful but does not waste time thanking the gods. He instead takes action to make the good fortune even better (e.g. asking Evelyn out for a date).


He’s a man of action and it is only towards the end of his life has he found the time to be a man of words. He writes with no need for exaggeration, his life experience is so abundant already. This can at times make the reading a little dry (especially when he describes the intricacies of farming), but when he does make a deep insight (about man, about God) it resonates with real life experience instead of philosophical musing.

November 21, 2010

Desert Night




Driving through the dark, I suddenly remember that night we drove through the desert.


You told me your dreams and I told you mine and in that empty space grew a field of ten thousand colors.


Now I’m driving alone through this small city and I wish you were in the passenger seat.


Maybe that way we could paint this city.


November 12, 2010

Autumn Flame (short story)


by James Y. Shih

For 永神



It was after school.


The boy was sitting under the slide, making designs in the tanbark.


He didn’t want to go home. Here, he was the master of the realm, a realm of magic and beauty. Everywhere else seemed out of control.


When he got out from under the slide, the sun was on its way down. He thought for sure he had only been there a few minutes, but the creeping darkness and chill told him otherwise.


He opened his backpack and put on his jacket, luckily his mom reminded him to bring one every day.


By now all his teachers and classmates had gone home. Standing alone on the blacktop, the school looked eerie in the dusk and he felt this uncontrollable urge to leave. Something was off.


He had white shoes on, so instead of going through the running field, he decided to take a nearby street route home. It was a beautiful street, with thirteen great big trees lining each side of it all the way down. By now, Autumn was in full force and gold leaves decorated the sidewalk. The lamps had turned on and it felt as if the whole world had a tinge of orange.


The boy looked ahead and down the street at the very end he could just make out the house of his good friend. He wondered: What would it be like when he got to the end of the street? From where he was standing, was there any way to know what the world would be like over there? Would it be any different?


He continued walking, enjoying the sound of crunching leaves under his feet. He kept his eyes on the concrete, making sure to crunch any brown leaves for that extra crunch sound. After a short while he looked up.


The houses had disappeared. He was standing on the sidewalk on an empty street with just the street lamps and trees still there. He tried to look past the trees to his left, but all he could see was darkness. To his right, he could still see in the distance the shadow of his empty school, with just night in between.


A slight breeze chilled him and he rubbed his hands and put them on his cheeks. The trees rustled and the shadows seemed to whisper in the orange light.


He wanted to go home.


He looked down the street. His friend’s house had disappeared but even further in the distance he saw a faint light. He knew in his heart that was home.


He began to walk with determination, the thought of warmth and comfort channeled strength to his legs. Then he heard something


Crack.


Something was behind him. He knew that if he turned to look that he would be lost in this dark world forever.


He began to run. His backpack fell off, but he didn’t care. The light ahead was growing brighter.


When he got to the end of the street, the trees, the lights, the sidewalk, and the pavement just faded into darkness. Near the center of this darkness was a man sitting at a wooden desk.


The light was coming from a giant oil lamp sitting on the desk. The desk and the man were turned profile to the boy. The man was writing something in a big velvet book. Leaning against the side of the desk facing the boy was a dark mahogany guitar. Stuck in the desktop next to the lamp was a silver butcher knife.


The boy did not feel any fear. He knew this man.


The man looked up from his book and looked at the boy. The man smiled.


“I was just writing about you.”


The boy smiled back. The man took the lamp from the desk and placed it in the center of the darkness.


The lamp turned into the size of a house and its gold flame seemed to light the entire world.


The boy looked at the flame, its warmth burning away all the sadness and loneliness he ever felt.


The boy was not afraid to die.


The boy stepped into the flame.


“Welcome home” the man said.


The flame flooded out of the lamp and engulfed the man. It flooded through the Autumn-colored street and then enveloped the empty school before returning back to the center leaving nothing but darkness behind.

November 9, 2010

The Pack: Wolf & Charlie Artwork

click image to enlarge


The Pack
"Wolf & Charlie" artwork by a p o
story by James Y. Shih

Introduction: I wrote this story in June of 2009. It originally belongs to my "Royal Mutt and Panda Bear" series. Over a year has passed, but as promised, I was finally able to commission a drawing for the story (i.e. repeatedly nagged an artist to draw something for me for free). a p o was able to get what I was going for almost immediately on top of that she added her own style that you can see clearly in the "Wolf & Charlie" drawing above. If you guys don't quite remember "The Pack", I've reposted the story below, minus the Royal Mutt and Panda Bear Intro/Outro bits. Let me know your guys thoughts on the drawing and/or story.

---
The Pack


There was a pack of dogs that grew up together in a small town. The pack was a nontraditional pack in the sense that no one was in charge. The pack would just roam the streets, picking up what scraps that they could and pass the time hanging out, chasing cats, and playing ball. They lived in an abandoned concrete lot with a rusted metal roof that protected them from the rain. They called it home.

They knew their place in this world. They knew that they loved this town and that although there might be greater things out there in the world, they were at least safe here. However, out of this unspectacular group of dogs, there were two that stood out: Wolf and Charlie.

Wolf was a strong, smart wolf-dog with a large white mane with a silver diamond tuff of hair in the center. Charlie was a tall and fierce black lab with an easy temper.

Frequently frustrated with the lack of direction with the pack, Wolf took the role of leader planning excursions out for food and trips around town.

Charlie resented Wolf, he loved the freedom of having no alpha dog, and would constantly butt heads with Wolf and try to undermine Wolf. The rest of the pack would always just watch amused, content to sit by the sidelines and not take any sides.

At one point, Wolf and Charlie had a confrontation that almost led to a dog fight. Wolf had decided that on that particular afternoon, the pack, excluding Charlie, was going to make a trip to the other side of town to get food since the trash collector had already collected all the trash in their neighborhood this morning.

Due to a recent possum attack, Charlie, the fiercest of the group, was dictated the role of guard dog until they came back. Charlie, not wanting to take orders from this self appointed leader, barked back, 'Wolf, I don't have to listen to you. I know that when you find a stuffed bin you will keep all the best scraps for yourself, leaving me with measly leftovers.'

Though this comment was probably more true for Lazy and Carl, Charlie singled out Wolf. Wolf tried to explain why Charlie was the best fit for being the guard dog, that the only other pack member as strong as Charlie was probably himself.

'Then why don't you be guard dog?,' Charlie barked back at Wolf. Wolf looked into Charlie's eyes. There was a long silence and the tension began to grow unbearable. Finally Wolf said very stoically to Charlie, 'Fine.'

Charlie turned to the pack that sat watching and as they made their way out to the street, Wolf, sitting in the center of the lot all by himself, said to Charlie and the pack, 'Goodbye.'

The pack made their way across town slowly. Charlie assumed that someone else in the pack knew the way, but everyone else thought that Charlie knew. Charlie not wanting to look bad in this new found position and definitely not wanting to turn to Wolf for help, used his sense of direction and got the pack lost many times much to the growing frustration and hunger of the pack.

When Charlie and the pack eventually got back from the other side of town, they found their home overrun with possums. Charlie's killer instinct switched on and began lunging at the possums and attacking with his jaws. He took some scratches to the face, but bit back twice as hard as the rest of the pack stood back and barked.

When everything settled down, and the possums had run away, Charlie realized that Wolf was gone and had been gone for a while. Charlie took it upon himself to search the lot for more possums as the rest of the pack chose to sleep rather than to help.

The next morning, Lazy was found dead behind the concrete lot, clawed to death by some possums that had made a nest in a corner that Charlie had overlooked. The possums were already long gone. The whole pack was in outrage and blamed Charlie for the death and for Wolf's departure. They all gathered around Charlie (yet still keeping a good distance) and unanimously agreed that Charlie was out of the pack and the only way he could return was if he returned with Wolf.

Disillusioned and with no place to go, Charlie set out to find Wolf. He made his rounds around town to the regular food stops, asking strays and other packs if they had seen or gotten a whiff of Wolf. Silver Stray, an old silver lab, had picked up a scent while passing the exit from town to the City.

Charlie following the scent traveled to the City, a metropolis that was a good day's jog away from town. Arriving there, he found himself in culture shock. The tall skyscrapers' loomed overhead as if to crash at any moment. The stunning skyline was a stark contrast to the darkness below, where he saw a dog kill another dog over a canister of pills.

He was by far one of the fiercest dogs in his town, but he found himself quivering as mangy dogs that smelled of shit and urine barked and snapped at him as he made his way out of the alleys of the City.

He eventually got to a park that was in a much nicer district, but by then it was dark and Charlie, feeling safer, made his home under a bench. Early next morning he began to ask the locals if they had seen Wolf. The dogs there however did not even give him the time of day, and passed him by or pretended to not hear him.

As he made his way to the edge of the park, he got a second whiff of Wolf and followed it to a beautiful oak tree that stood out like a sore paw.

Wolf sat under the tree looking out into the city streets. 'Wolf!' Charlie yelled out.

Wolf turned and looked surprised. 'Charlie?'

They met each other under the shade of the oak and nearly touched noses until they remembered the animosity they were supposed to feel towards each other.

'Lazy's dead. We need you back.'

Surprised, Wolf said, 'What?'

"'Lazy, he got killed by possums, it's all your fault. You were supposed to watch the home. You weren't there, you let down the pack, you got one of our own killed you son of a bitch,' Charlie barked.

Wolf sat, looking at Charlie.

'Did you come all the way here to blame me?', Wolf said.

'Yes and also to bring you back. You're going to have to face the entire pack for what you did.'

'What I did? All I did was give you what you wanted, freedom from my orders,' Wolf replied.

'But you were supposed to watch the home, that was your job! You had a responsibility and you threw it away!' There were tears in Charlie's eyes.

'I gave you that job first remember? My job was to get our pack food because I knew the way, but you were too stubborn to even recognize that fact and undoubtedly got our pack lost and hungry. It wasn't easy for me to leave, that was my home too. But I could see that living there and being the alpha, I was only going to get resentment from those dogs, you showed me that.'

'What the hell are you talking about?' replied Charlie.

'I tried my best, I really did,' it was Wolf's turn to have tears in his eyes. 'The pack, I mean I love them, I was willing to give them everything. They have so much potential, all those dogs, but I realized that they are not me. They're content chasing cars, stealing meat from the butcher, chasing tail. I'm not saying that's wrong, that's their choice. But life is an incredible mystery. I felt that in that small town and in that small pack I only got the tip of the garbage heap. I was planning on leaving anyways, and when you left with the pack, I saw my opportunity.'

'What the hell does this have to do with anything?' Charlie snapped back, 'You were supposed to do something and failed. You see these scratches on my face? Do you know how mutilated Lazy's body was when I found him?'

Wolf's face quickly changed from a face of sensitivity to that of anger, an anger born from exhaustion.

'I'm tired.'

'Huh?'

'I'm tired of taking all the blame. I'm tired of being responsible for things other grown dogs should have easily handled by themselves. Did you really come all this way to put the blame on me? Fine. You win. I'll take the blame, I'll wear the weight of Lazy's death on my back. But remember this, this is the last time. From now on you're responsible for your own life. You didn't come all the way here just to make yourself feel better. Even though you hated me the most out of the pack, know this, I always had the most respect for you.'

Stunned, always thinking that Wolf detested him, Charlie sat listening.

'You know why? Because at least you had an opinion, at least you were willing to confront me. And although your intentions might not have been a 100% right, at least you took action. You came here because you knew you were different. You have a different path from the pack, as do I. I won't be able to carry you on the path because I'm trying to discover what that is for myself. I'm going to leave now and I don't want you to follow me. If you do, I will kill you. But if we do meet again, let it be further down the road when we are better dogs and can be better friends.'

Charlie watched like a statue frozen by Wolf's words as Wolf sat up from under the tree and disappeared into the city streets. After some time, Charlie took Wolf's place under the tree and sat quietly.

He could hear the wind, the hum of humans and machines, and other dogs barking in the distance. The slight breeze brought with it a small hurricane of leaves and smells. The smells and sounds of the city enveloped Charlie as he watched the skyscrapers crash around him into shards of glass.

The End.

September 27, 2010

A Song For a Friend


Here's the song (click "play lo/hi-fi").


Lyrics:

Ewing Sarcoma

By James Y. Shih


Ewing's not a friend of mine

He sits on your lower spine

He came out for the summertime

To take some of your time


I called you the other day

"Tell Ewing to go away"

Like a bad guest, he overstays

And sits on your bed


Ewing Sarcoma

He's been making you feel ill, we'll kill him together

Ewing Sarcoma

He'll be leaving soon and soon you'll get better


I heard on another day,

You're going through chemotherapy (chemo)

Sounds kinda bomb

Like Michael Rosenbaum


You are two in a million

You've got talent, you've got feeling (you’ve got feeling)

Across the sea I wrote this song to give you some healing (not sexual)


Ewing Sarcoma

He's been making you feel ill, we'll kill him together

Ewing Sarcoma

He'll be leaving soon and soon you'll get better.


______

/Bridge\


Ewing Sarcoma

He's been making you feel ill, we'll kill him together

Ewing Sarcoma

He'll be leaving soon and soon you'll get better.

September 10, 2010

Mascots are Funny

Not too long ago, I was up on the hill snowboarding and took this picture of an interview:




They were interviewing a ski instructor on proper skiing techniques. Make note of the big critter in the back, a big possum mascot for a major Australian TV network.

I sat and watched with amusement. The crew started to make their way down the hill and sensing something might happen, I started to film.

I was happily rewarded:


August 13, 2010

Up Till Now

It happened in Melbourne.

He was sitting at a cafe on a trendy alley off of Little Flinders Street. Everyone there looked liked artists of some sort or other, dressed in their autumn best, writing or sketching their latest inspiration into black notebooks.

With his dark brown Kangol beret and a cup of overpriced hot chocolate on the table, an incredible sense of insecurity and loneliness came over him.

"I'm a fraud," he thought.

He didn't belong there.

This impression had planted a seed of doubt into his future plans of living in a big city back in the States. He had plans of "making it", of chasing a dream.

But there was a deeper doubt, a doubt that had already been growing for some time.

Many times people chase after not the thing they want the most, but the thing they want second best. It's much easier to take failure when the thing you were working so hard towards, wasn't what you really wanted in the first place.

A year ago, he asked himself what he wanted to do, what he wanted to make of the finite time that he had here in this universe.

Up till now, he had been chasing phantoms and had let himself be drawn to Sirens on this ocean of time.

Looking back though, he had no real regrets. Wandering for him, had given him direction.

After New Zealand was Melbourne and Melbourne was a wake up call. He had found it ironic that though cities are supposed to be the pinnacle of civilization, it's the place where you find the most uncivilized behavior. The city attracts money, money attracts people, and with only so much money and space, people begin to hate people and treat each other as such. But it wasn't all bad, he had made a few friends and got to see a lot of interesting things.

After Melbourne was Jindabyne, a small ski resort town and it's here he's discovered the joy of a simple life with just enough distractions that he can handle.

Through these waves of change he's been able to wash away a bit of what he thought was important, but in reality wasn't. He's been able to get a good look at himself and get a better understanding of his strengths and weaknesses.

While in Jindabyne, on a special day, he reread a journal entry written exactly one year ago. He had wrote "I can't leave sand castles[...] I have to leave something that can withstand the waves, something that touches the infinite in this finite time that I have."

It made him smile and think to himself, "We're all making sand castles on the shore of time, we would be fooling ourselves if we thought otherwise. But so what? The only thing infinite is finiteness."

The entry reminded him of an old interview he read where Paulo Coelho, the author of The Alchemist, told the interviewer, "I see death as a beautiful woman. She says, 'pay attention and try to get the best of every moment because I am going to take you.'"

The thought made him smile and he adds to it, "...And She drives away the Sirens and sings a song that had been residing inside me all this time."

I just need to listen.

July 29, 2010

New Zealand Blog Day 13: Last Day on the Road and the start of Quality Time with Family



Saturday April 24th, 2010

Day 13

Last Day on the Road and the start of Quality Time with Family

Not much to write about on this last day. We had to return the car before our flight in the afternoon so we spent all morning driving. It was a rainy day.

When we got into Christchurch, we got some Mackers for the road (Mackers = McDonalds in Australia, not sure about NZ). There must be an addictive additive in the Big Mac. After cooking my own meals for a while, I get this craving for a Big Mac (it was the first thing I got when I got off the mango farm).

When we dropped off the car we had to say goodbye to the 30 dollar comforter we bought and used as our bed for the past week, the rental guy said they’d take care of it (probably just throw it away, so sad).

The rental car company (Nationwide) had a free shuttle from their office to the airport so we took that and caught our flight on time back to Auckland.

So…how much did this road trip cost me?

Total for today: 166 NZD (includes Jetstar plane ticket from Christchurch back to Auckland: 113 NZD)

Total for trip overall: 1312.8 NZD

Daily Average of Costs: 100.98 NZD

Now if we also include my round trip Emirates plane ticket from Melbourne to Auckland (which was 519.48 NZD), my total cost for the trip is 1832.28 NZD (Daily Average of 130.88 NZD).

1832.28 NZD = 1476.31 AUD = 1330.60 USD

The breakdown of this total from the greatest to least cost is as follows (Note DA = Daily Average, all prices in NZD):

International Airfare (Melbourne<->Auckland): 519.48

Domestic Transport: 351.8

Accommodation: 260 (DA: 20)

Gas: 251.2 (DA: 19.32)

Food & Drink: 249.8 (DA: 19.22)

Communications (Internet, Phone, Mail): 77 (DA: 5.92)

Tours: 45

Clothes and Amenities: 71 (DA: 5.46)

Laundry: 7

Airfare and transportation costs are the biggest money bleeders. These are my own personal share of the costs so the total cost of this trip for the two of us is roughly: 3664.56 NZD = 2952.63 AUD = 2661.20 USD

Epilogue:

My last four days in New Zealand were spent with family. My mom, who hasn’t seen her brother in a long time, came to visit. It’s already been half a year since I left home, so it was really nice to see her. I stayed with my uncle’s family and they were the perfect hosts, showing us around all the spots in Auckland and giving Apo and I food! = )

My Uncle played tour guide and was very knowledgeable about the city and the surrounding areas. Auckland has a lot to offer and I’m glad that we took four days to check it out instead of the one day-one town road trip phase. Much appreciation to my Uncle for showing us around.

I’ve collected Auckland’s greatest hits in this photo album.

This is the end of my New Zealand Blog. Hopefully it was helpful and entertaining.

So what happened after New Zealand? Well, that will be covered in my next post…Up Till Now.

New Zealand Blog Day 12: Mount Aoraki (aka Mount Cook)




Friday April 23rd, 2010

Day 12

The Road Trip is Almost at an End.

We woke up in the morning and had some cornflakes (we used our cups as bowls and some plastic spoons). After paying for accommodation and saying goodbye to the owner we hit the road.

Today was Mount Aoraki (aka Mount Cook) day and we began our drive up to the mountain. Along the way we came across Lake Punaki, which is absolutely stunning. The color of the water is a milky aquamarine. The clouds overhead seemed to have been brushed onto the sky. We stopped and I jumped past the rocks to get up close to the water for some pictures. Afterwards, I kept driving in what I thought was the right direction.

Wrong. First of all the road was not going in an incline as most mountain roads do nor did the scenery change that much. It wasn’t until we were in Fairlie that I realized I had missed the mountain completely.

We checked the map, and it was going to take us about another hour to drive back and 30 minutes to get to the mountain from the turn off that I missed. There was nothing really to see from Fairlie to Christchurch and so I made the decision to turn back. Needless to say, the Missus was fuming at the wasted daylight time, but I opted to pay for the gas seeing as it was my fault for not checking the map carefully before driving. Just going only slightly above the speed limit, we made our way back.

We made it back to the turn off towards Mount Cook/Aoraki in one hour and started on the road to the mountain area. The road to Mount Aoraki is the most picturesque road I have ever driven, seriously. To the right is the beautiful Lake Punaki and ahead and to the left are mountains that seem to surround you and enclose you. Rays of light cut through the clouds and hit the lake and the mountains creating a breathtaking light show. However, as we got closer to the visitor centre located at the base of the mountain, the sky had completely turned from a bright blue hue to a dismal grey. When we got out of the car, the cold air and moisture hits you. Half an hour of driving and we were in a different world.

When we finally got up close to the “Cloud Piercer” we were a bit disappointed. Clouds and fog obscured the view and the area surrounding the base of the mountain just seemed very grey.

We checked out the visitor centre that had a quote on display that hit me deeply:


Though the author of the quote is talking about mountain climbing, I related it to martial arts. In mortal combat, one gets a glimpse of the reality of existence. To face death is to know life. There are safer ways to challenge oneself be it in the realm of mountain climbing or martial arts but the idea to place oneself in a very true, primal experience is still there.

After the visitor centre we had a salmon and spinach pizza at the hotel just up the walking path. It was very tasty (much to Apo’s delight) but was very small (much to my dismay).

After, we went to go see the Tasman Glacier, but as Lonely Planet said, it’s “a bit dirty looking” and was not very impressive.

We left the Mount Aoraki/Cook area and made our way towards Christchurch. It was getting quite dark when we arrived in Geraldine (about 140 km out from Christchurch) and decided to find a caravan park here for the night. We found one and YES, they had cooking utensils =).

That night, after doing some shopping at a local supermarket, Apo stewed up some chicken drumsticks with porridge and vegetables. Cold nights and porridge go together like ice cream on a summer’s day so I didn’t mind at all having porridge again. As we ate dinner we watched American Idol on a small TV they had in the kitchen (I especially liked the singer/guitarist Tim Urban).

Thinking back, I realized that the highlight of the day was not our main destination (Mount Aroaki/Cook) but the road there.

Today was our last full day on the road. It has been fun, but I’m eager to see family and sleep in a warm bed. Till then.

DT: 71.35

RT: 1146.8

RDA: 95.57

New Zealand Blog Day 11: Wanaka


Thursday April 22nd, 2010

Day 11

Wanaka!

It’s quite a unique name for a place and it is also quite a unique place. We spent the morning at the hostel looking up places to visit around the area. I had a craving for pizza and we decided to have lunch at “The Cow”. We bought a huge pizza there for 32 NZD and we made it a point to eat the whole damn thing. It was quite good. I was not a fan of the celery topping, but the ham, pepperoni, tomato, onion, mushroom, and cheeses blended well.

However, during our after lunch walk around Lake Wanaka flatulence hit us with a vengeance. The excess gas did cut down our walking time by a few seconds as it propelled us down the lakeside.

Lake Wanaka is picturesque. There were a bunch of Chinese tourists with really professional looking camera equipment taking pictures of leaves, water, and other naturey things. It’s quite a draw for nature lovers and photographers (pictures). The autumn leaves by the lakeside reminded me of school and it made me miss home a bit.

After the lake, we had some coffee and ice cream at the Cinema Paradiso in town. Cinema Paradiso is quite a novelty in that their theatre is set up like somebody’s house, with couches and tables, and you can order food to be served to you during intermission. We didn’t catch a movie as there was nothing playing that we liked so after our drinks we went into the car and headed towards Mount Aoraki (Mount Cook).

We arrived in the small town of Twizel, just south of the mountain in the evening and after wandering around town finally found a caravan park. It was after hours, but the owner was still in his office and was kind enough to let us stay and said we could just pay in the morning.

We were pretty hungry and were eager to start cooking up some dinner. They had a kitchen at the park but problem is, no cooking utensils = O. After our little splurge this afternoon for lunch we were not keen to go out and eat again.

Luckily, a cyclist from Alaska was in the campsite next to us and had a squashed tin pot in her bag that we could use. After bending it back into shape, Apo cooked up some porridge with pork and vegetables, quite a good meal on a chilly night.

Tomorrow Mount Aoraki, the cloud piercer!

DT: 66.6

RDA: 97.77

RT: 1075.45

New Zealand Blog Day 10: Franz Josef/Fox Glacier

As I said I would, I'm posting up the remaining three posts for my New Zealand Blog. There's no excuse for my procrastination. I'm determined to finish this series so as to bring closure to it and also so that I may be able to talk about more current events (like my life here in Jindabyne). Now, the rest of my NZ blog:


Wednesday April 21st, 2010

Day 10

Franz Josef/Fox Glacier

Aw, glacier day!

So we were thinking about doing a half day hike tour for Franz Josef (105 NZD, Fox Glacier is a little bit cheaper, 90 NZD), but an English girl told us last night that her friends did it and thought that it was a waste of time (“You spend nearly half the time just walking to the glacier”). So we scrapped that idea. I asked Apo around 7am in the morning what she thought about doing the full day tour (Franz Josef 160 NZD, Fox 145 NZD). She was still half asleep and time was running out, so we decided today we would DIY and check out the glaciers ourselves and if we saw fit, do a tour tomorrow.

Thus, Apo slept in, while I watched an excellent New Zealand film called “Once Were Warriors” on my laptop. The actor that plays Jango Fett and the clones in the Clone Wars (Temeura Morrison) is the male lead in the film.

After breakfast we checked out of the hostel and made our way to the first glacier, Franz Josef. The thing about glaciers is that they’re not easy to get to. As I mentioned before, you have to walk a good amount of time before you get to the ice, for Franz Josef about 1-1.5 hr.

The walk to the glacier however, is quite beautiful. Many years ago, the glacier had cut through the mountain and then started to retreat (retreating extremely rapidly at 70 cm/day in 1984) leaving behind a valley abundant in waterfalls and glacier-cut rocks as you can see here.

We got as close to the glacier as we could without the need of a tour guide (to get onto the glacier itself you have to join a tour as the area is extremely dangerous and special equipment is needed). Looking out onto the valley with the glacier behind you is quite an experience. The glacier itself is also very beautiful and you could make out people dotting the ice surface far up the glacier.

Walking back, I hella needed to go to the bathroom and the nearest one was back at the carpark almost an hour away. As I walked through that pristine valley full of glacier water waterfalls, all I could think about was taking a piss. After relieving myself in the port-a-potty, we headed towards Fox Glacier.

At the small town next to Fox, we had a seafood basket with chips (French fries) which was quite good but quite costly (15 NZD). Afterwards, we had a walk around the nearby Lake Matheson. The walk around the lake and the views of the mountains in the distance reminded me of this old painting my parents have back at the house. The painting is of an American landscape, but there was a visual similarity I found looking out at the mountains with the water in the foreground that reminded me of that painting and also of the house I grew up in.

Fox Glacier was a bit disappointing compared to Franz Josef, it’s much flatter and smaller. However, it’s much closer and easier to get to which was good because our legs by this point were getting all walked out. The signs going up to the glaciers describe extremely serious situations but also have a child-like quality to them (I’m assuming so that even a child can understand what they mean). I had a drink from the stream coming from the glacier (making sure that it was in a safe, open area with stable footing) and it tasted quite good, cool and crisp and had a bit of a salty taste to it.

Back at the carpark, I saw an elderly lady feed a green Kea some crackers with the tour guide looking on. If you read one of my previous posts about the begging ducks, you can understand my discomfort at seeing that Kea eating crackers. The Kea is a majestic bird with a powerful beak and claw that it sometimes uses to tear the fat off of sheep. But here it was, manically chasing a cracker to the elderly peoples’ amusement. But I didn’t say anything. I did notice a tag on one of the Kea’s leg and, with the help of cognitive dissonance, resolved that the Kea was probably a pet of one of the park rangers and was too far gone, that it needed humans for substance. Thinking back, I should’ve mentioned something and not have just stood there as they fed the bird (note: a “Please Do Not Feed the Wildlife” sign was about 20 metres away).

On the drive from Fox to our next stop, Wanaka, we stopped at Bruce Bay. A significant feature of Bruce Bay is that its beach is full of circular rocks and pebbles that people like to stack or write on. Also, it’s a great place to watch the sunset and though we couldn’t see the sun because of the clouds, the different hues of pink and blue made up for it.

We arrived in Wanaka that night at around 9pm, which was shit for us because most of the hostels we called had already closed reception by this time. Luckily we found a hostel (Mountain View Backpackers) in our trusty NZ Lonely Planet that was still open and had a very nice double room available. It was the most comfortable bed we’ve had all trip which was good, because we were exhausted.

Sleep.


Reminder: DT= Day's Total (i.e. the total costs for that day), RT = Running Total, RDA = Running Daily Average (i.e. the daily average spending up to that day)


DT: 92.9

RT: 1008.85

RDA: 100.89

July 1, 2010

How to Get Out of Slavery: A Message to Children of Immigrants and/or Controlling Parents

There is this terrible misinterpretation that is pervasive among children of migrant parents: In order to show your love and gratitude to your parents, you must do what they say.

聽媽媽的話 or “Listen to your mother”, these phrases are drilled into us as children. What happens then is that people take this advice literally, whatever their mother or father tells them to do, they do it. This is not so dangerous when they’re telling you to put on a jacket but it is when it comes to education or career choices:

“Go study this”.

“Go be that”.

And the kids do it. But what is surprisingly absent in these life changing decisions is the child’s own voice. (Please note, when I say “child” I’m not referring to a five year old, I’m talking about a young adult who is beginning to make decisions for him/herself that will affect the rest of their life).

What happens then is that there are legions of people in fields of study and professions that they don’t really care about. They’ve been the good son and daughter and they’ve done what their parents told them to do at the price of their life.

So what is the misinterpretation? Where does this misinterpretation occur?

Let’s look at the phrase again: In order to show your love and gratitude to your parents, you must do what they say.

This is a concept that is derived from my observation of the Asian migrant community in America but I believe it translates to many migrant communities around the world. There is this pressure (spoken or unspoken) by children to acknowledge the hardships and sacrifices that their parents went through to come to a new country and give them a better life. The problem is that this acknowledgment constantly comes in the form of slavery.

However, this does not have to be the case.

Good parents want one thing for their children: They want them to be happy. This in turn will make the parents happy.

The misinterpretation is that the children believe that doing what their parents tell them to do will make the parents happy when in fact, if their parents are reasonable people, the child’s own happiness will make the parents happy. It may not in the short term, but after some time, the parents will recognize that their child is doing what he/she wants and will accept that.

Where the misinterpretation occurs is that parents think they know what their children want and the children believe that. The reality is this: only YOU know what you want.^

Migrants move to a new country generally for one reason: stability.

They’re escaping economic/political instability in their own country to explore the prospect of a more stable life abroad.

To them stability = happiness.

Let’s assume that this equation is true, taking happiness as a constant and stability as a variable. Most migrant parents define stability in a few choice professions: medicine, law, engineering, and accounting. They don’t understand that the idea of a stable job has broadened to incorporate all different kinds of sectors and professions. * With self knowledge and knowledge of what’s out there, you will realize what you want to do and define “stability” in your own terms.

The bottom line is this: parents are human beings too. The advice they give should be taken with the same grains of salt you season other peoples’ advice with. If it’s good advice, it’s good, if it’s bad advice, it’s bad. You must not focus on the person giving the advice but the actual advice itself and how it relates to you.

One of the major obstructions to making such a differentiation is a mental one: as the child you feel inherently guilty for doing anything that might go against what your parents envisioned for you. DON’T FEEL GUILTY.

This is your life and you and only you are responsible for your own happiness. When you realize that, you will be free.



^To know what you want is a lifelong journey. By knowing yourself and what is important to you, you will be in command of your own life. Thus, it’s a journey well worth taking. Your life experience will inform you what is important to you, listen to that.

*I have nothing against medicine, law, engineering, or accounting, they are all very honorable professions. The problem I believe is that there is an overemphasis, especially in the Asian migrant community, to pursue these professions without regards to the fact if the child fits that profession. I believe that there is a natural statistical spread of what people should be i.e. in a group of a 100 randomly selected people I do believe there is a number of them that are meant to be doctors, a number of them are meant to be musicians and a smaller number that are meant to be both. I don’t know what those numbers are but I feel there is a greater shift, more so than that of the general public, in the Asian migrant community towards the medicine, law, engineering, and accounting professions that deviates from a natural norm. What that natural norm is quantitatively I don’t know, but qualitatively I know it’s there.

June 9, 2010

Something to Write Home About



Hey all.

As you might have noticed, the blog has been quiet since my New Zealand Blog Day 9 post (3 more posts to go for that series).

I had taken a break from that series to focus on making a short film for a film competition sponsored by the Overseas Compatriot Affairs Commission (OCAC), a Taiwanese government organization that oversees overseas Taiwanese affairs. The title of the competition is "My Second Home". The general purpose of the competition is to have Taiwanese or those of Taiwanese descent to share with other's (through film) their stories living away from home. The OCAC's also hopes that this competition promotes internationally the independent status of Taiwan (though they might not say so so directly).


My video can be viewed here:

http://video.mactv.com.tw/filmDetail.html?fid=184

Title: Something to Write Home About

Synopsis:

James is a 2nd generation Taiwanese-American living in Australia. Living in a different country, he’s come to realize the realities of life as a foreigner. Even though he’s thousands of miles from home, the move has made him feel even more connected to his parents who moved from Taiwan to America before he was born. James shares these thoughts with his brother back in the states as he gets ready for work.


Backstory:

This film happened because of two things: 1) My girlfriend's passport got stolen, 2) Not getting work in Melbourne. My gf passport had been stolen while we were staying at the Nomads All Nations Backpackers on Spencer St (WARNING: Do not stay there).

I had accompanied her to get her passport replaced and saw an ad for this competition in the reception desk window. I took a picture of it and didn't think too much about it for three weeks. After three weeks had passed of job searching with no luck on finding steady income (did some labour work for a few days setting up exhibitions), I came across that picture again.

We had a job set up towards the end of June in NSW and it looked like we weren't going to be getting any work anytime before that so...why not make a film? By this time though, I had one week before the deadline (May 31st) and had to figure out something fast. My gf gave me the idea of linking my life abroad with that of my parents a generation earlier. I liked the idea not only because it connected to the topic, but it also connected to my life at that point in time.

From this focus I began developing different ideas for the film (with help from my girlfriend who was a great soundboard to bounce ideas off of). After trial and error (video footage I previously recorded not working), watching some music videos and commercials (see "Misread" by Kings of Convenience and Spike Jonze's MV for California by WAX), and a conversation with a friend (explained below) the short film took shape to what you see/hear now.

Aside from the fact that my cooking hasn't really improved that much, nor did I ever remove rocks from a cave, the rest is true. The rocks in a cave line comes from a conversation I had with a fellow backpacker/labourer: his job for two days was to remove rocks from under a house by himself using buckets. He said it was hard but the money was good and it was a new experience. We continued talking about our experiences here in Australia and he said, "Here I have no one. You have to fight for everything. You have to fight to exist." When he said that, it really struck a chord with me and echoed what my director friend told me about being a filmmaker (his film coincidentally is named Fight Life). This conversation helped me make the final changes to the script that I needed.


Director's Statement:

This film is about discovery. But what I'm discovering has always been there. It's akin to a familiar story of the protagonist searching far and wide for treasure only to realize that it's in his own backyard. It is my parents and their courage to leave their home country to make new lives in a foreign land that planted the roots of my existence. It's a part of who I am but I never really appreciated that past until I experienced it myself living in Australia. In Taiwan and America, I have a support net of family and friends, but in Australia I only have my girlfriend. If we fall, we fall and nothing will catch us. However my parents faced the same situation along with much greater obstacles well over thirty years ago. They're a source of inspiration. By being away from home, I feel closer to them. My home is my family and is all the treasure I need.

May 16, 2010

New Zealand Blog Day 9


Tuesday April 20th, 2010

Rata Lodge -> Hokitika -> Franz Josef


And it was beautiful.

In the morning light, the mountains and the clouds seemed to meld together perfectly. The air was fresh and cool and I drank it in with delight.

We said our farewells to our new friends from Israel as they headed out on the road before us. Apo and I had breakfast and perused through the guest book of the backpackers (Rata Lodge was the name).

After we packed up, I went to the owner’s lodge and gave it a knock.

Last night I didn’t get a clear look of the owner, so when he came out, I was pretty surprised. A white guy in his fifties with dreadlocks opened the door. He was wearing a wool jacket that looked really old and comfortable and somewhat…Jamaican?

“You guys sleep allright?”

“Yeah, we did. It was very comfortable, thank you.”

We said goodbye and made our way to Hokitika, a coastal town just north of the glaciers. We passed more beautiful mountains and animals (deers, cows, and of course sheep) before arriving into the quaint town of Hokitika. The town is famous for its Jade Museum and Hokitika Gorge, about 20 km southeast.

Also, their fish and chips are the bomb. There’s a shop just next to the Jade Museum that sells $5 fish and chips and according to Apo, “These are the best and cheapest fish and chips I’ve ever had.” I tasted some of hers and indeed they were darn good.

After a quick lunch we drove to Hokitika Gorge, stopping on the way to take some photos of llamas. They are so cool. I wanted to run over to them and hug them but I contained myself.

At Hokitika Gorge, the first thing I noticed was the water. Aquamarine blue. When I was young, this was my favorite color. I used to believe that somewhere, out in the big wide world, this color must exist, be it in the ocean or forest lakes of an unknown region. But as I got older, I thought that that was a silly notion, and that such colors were manufactured artificially in a lab to gain more market share in the cutthroat color industry. But here it was, in ready supply, just flowing through this gorge. The child in me smiled.

I went to the water and cupped it in my hand, but the color disappeared. So I put it back. Nature is most beautiful when we enjoy it as it is instead of trying to grasp it firmly between our hands. While at the gorge, a South Island fantail kept flying around Apo, as if dancing around her.

After the gorge, we began our drive to Franz Josef. We got there in the evening, checking into a cheap hostel (Montrose Backpackers). The problem with very cheap hostels is usually that they’re full of cheap people and this place was no exception.

While cooking in the crowded kitchen, a girl yelled at me for using the sink while she was using it. What happened was that she was scrubbing a cutting board off to one side of the sink, while letting the water run. I saw that she was not using the water and I rinsed a spoon while she was scrubbing.

“Hey. I’m using the sink.”

“Sorry, I just wanted to rinse this spoon.”

“You should ask first or say excuse me.”

The thing is, she’s right, I should’ve at least said excuse me. But she was glaring at me and was saying this to me in a very rude manner and my girlfriend backed me up.

“Do you have to be so bossy?”

“I’m not bossy, it’s rude OK?”

Then she left.

Lesson: Be careful in a crowded area not to step on other people’s toes. Some people have certain pet peeves about personal space and its always best to first ask before doing an action that enters someone else space.

Putting that behind us, we looked forward to the Franz Josef and Fox Glaciers tomorrow.

DT: 39.9

RDA: 101.77

RT: 915.95